For months, I had been secretly laughing at the noodle stall owner. Before the incident, I had seen him smoking, gambling and drinking at the coffee shop where his stall is located. When I notice that his wife no longer come over to help him manage the stall, deep in, I laughed at him for he deserved to be without his wife, to be alone for life. Who asked him to smoke, gamble and drink, I thought.
For months, I have seen him struggling to manage the stall alone. He looks tired, disoriented and lifeless. While I didn't like his behaviour, I still buy my favourite noodle from him. It’s tasty and in anyway, his behaviour had nothing to do with his noodle.
Ok, Ok... I am just addicted to his noodle. Giving me excuses to patronize his stall.
I felt bad last weekend. Felt very bad for being judgmental, very bad for secretly laughing at his suffering, very bad for the wrongful accusation without finding out more.
His wife was there when I ordered my noodle last weekend morning. Her hair was short, almost bald and seems to have just grown from a clean shave. She also seems to be very tired but I can see that she feel relieve and happy to be back.
No, I am not going to judge again. What facts do I have to know what had happened to her? What rights do I have to find out what had happened? What position am I in to judge her? It is bad enough that I had likely made a mistake judging her husband. It would be very bad for me to judge her this time.
How I hoped I have the courage to go up to him to apologize for my bad behaviour. But no, I don't have the courage to admit that I had been secretly laughing at him. What's more, he will likely think I am crazy cause the act of laughing at him only happens in my mind. What I can do is likely to eat his noodle more frequently for now.
Please do not follow my mistake. Don't judge unless you are 100% sure, supported by evidence. In any case, who are we to judge?
I am sorry.